This week started off like it normally does a whirlwind. Trying to take care of the kids and get everyone fed and ready. Sterling was being difficult arguing about what he was going to wear to school, he is so darn opinionated all the time. I felt myself getting annoyed thinking why is everything a battle him.
Then while I was home feeding Frances I was looking on my phone and read about Ryan, his mom is a blogger and writes the blog baby boy bakery. Now I don’t know this family and have never read her blog but this story hit close to home. Ryan was outside playing and ran in the street to catch a Frisbee and was hit by a truck and killed. It struck me that this could happen to any of our kids. I was looking at Ryan’s pictures and he reminded me so much of Sterling, so full of personality and life and that life was tragically taken away. I cried sitting there thinking about how petty it was of me to be annoyed with Sterling about getting dressed in the morning. I cried for that sweet family and the unimaginable loss of their son. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain they are feeling. Then I read about two more sweet boys who passed away this week. Then just this morning I learned that our friends in Charlotte whose daughter had been battling leukemia passed away yesterday. My heart is so heavy thinking of the loss of those children. Children are just not supposed to die before their parents. Life can be so hard and unfair sometimes.
It has really made me stop and think about how short life can be. It has made me hug my kids a little tighter, and cherish every moment with them. We all face struggles everyday and in the moment they seem real and hard but they are nothing compared to what these families are going through. I am trying to have more patience with my kids especially Sterling because he is 4 going on 15. He is such a smart mouthed boss these days and as much as it exhausts me, you know what, I love that about him too. He is so strong willed and certain it will serve him well later in life. I forget that he is only 4 sometimes. I walked into this scene last week and it literally melted my heart. He has such a sweet soul and I want to savor these moments.
and Frances is growing up faster than I imagined. With the second child it just whirls by. I can’t believe she is 5 months, I know her one year birthday will be here before I know it. I think about the struggle it took for me to conceive her and I am so grateful for her and my heart aches for others going through the same struggle. I got my baby but some women can’t get pregnant or lose their babies. I feel sad just thinking about that struggle when you so desperately want a child. Frances has the sweetest personality, she is always smiling and so laid back. I am so thankful for her sweet light filled soul.
Yesterday this elderly woman walked past us in the grocery store, Sterling was hitting Frances and I was trying to get my groceries as quickly as possible. I was on the verge of tears because I was tired and my patience was running out and we still had two more errands to run. She stopped me and said I remember those days well, they seem tough but you will look back and think they are the best days of your life. The thing is I know she is right, it is just sometimes hard to enjoy it when you are in the thick of it. In light of all the events I read about this week I want to try hard and not be stressed out and enjoy these years. I am lucky to have these children in my life.
Today I am praying hard for all these families and the unimaginable loss and void they are filling in their lives. I ask you all to do the same. Prayer helps comfort in times like this. I am also working hard to be in the moment with my children and not be consumed by my to-do list. I just want to love them and be present with them. I am also thanking God for my healthy babies, when so many others have such uphill battles right now. I know this is a somber post for Friday but I want to acknowledge the loss of these families. It just isn’t fair. Lets be there for them in their darkest moments.
Please keep all these families in your prayers right now as they are going through the unimaginable.